
Be forewarned, I'm feeling a teeny bit mushy on this rainy afternoon. Blame it on the hormones, the rain, or the just being a woman, but consider yourself warned:) Mostly, I think I'm feeling this way because I bought rice cereal today at the grocery store. I keep coming up with excuses for not feeding Judson solids yet, but the real reason is that it makes me cry that my baby is old enough for real food. For some reason, that little thing represents the beginning of when the months start going by REALLY fast! See the first 4-5 months around here are like climbing a grassy hill. It's nice and all, but it's still a struggle. After you get to the top, it's just lovely...and pretty easy to just take it all in. Then, you start going down the hill and you pretty much roll down it so fast you miss it. And then your teeny, tiny baby is ONE. I just want to slow this all down!
So that leads me into...a couple of weeks ago, Pam and Jim got married on the Office. On the way to the ceremony, they talked about taking "mental snapshots or pictures" of the day...things they wanted to remember, but knew wouldn't be caught with a camera. Then, this morning (around 2:30 a.m. when I was up with Judson), I was reading a blog of a girl with a 17 month old. She talked about these "mental pictures" of things she wanted to remember about her little boy that you really can't take a picture of. That's it...I need to take some "mental pictures," but write them down.
It's those sweet moments you think you'll always remember, but you don't.
Those moments that tug at your heart, and you just want to bottle them up and keep them close.
The moments you need to remember when it seems you're falling apart.

Moments like when Paul David:
says, "You wanna play football with me?"
holds his baby brother's hand every time he holds him.
was a baby, and he ALWAYS slept at the end of the baby bed by the door...ALWAYS.
wore a sticker with the UT tower on it to bed and woke up with it the next day.
sucked on my shoulder to go to sleep until he found his thumb.
made sure to hold my hand when we walked in to MDO


And the moments when Judson:
grabbed my face between his hands the other night as I was putting him to bed
lunged for my Sonic cup and was so excited when I put it near him
would stretch out his arms and poke out his bottom when you picked him up when he was teeny, tiny
smiled the biggest smile at you just because you smiled at him
sleeps in the same corner of the bed...top left corner

Yes, those are the moments that make every day the best day ever...even though I don't realize it sometimes! I will say that this being a parent thing is THE HARDEST THING EVER, but boy do the rewards come pouring in. When I taught, I thought it was hard, but very rewarding. I always dreaded going, though. Staying at home, is way harder and way more rewarding...and I don't dread any day. Now, I may not want to get out of bed or can't wait to go to bed, but I don't dread getting up every morning...even when I was getting up 4 times at night:) My house is a wreck, there are groceries in bags in the kitchen floor, I need to take a shower, but I'm so crazy happy.
So how could I be sitting here crying my eyes out, but be the happiest I've ever been??? When you know you're very blessed and so content...well, you cry...tears of JOY! I know the months just get better and better from now on, but I want to treasure each moment...the good and the bad!
Now, I guess I'll go find a place on the shelf for that Rice Cereal!